Copping a Money ‘Tude

“When we married, we wanted to be responsible for our own past financial obligations so that we would be fair to each other,” Marcos says. “But we continually work together to tweak our joint budget.”

How did your parents handle money? Your financial experiences will affect your marriage, so it would be wise for you to discuss these questions together as soon as you can. How have your life experiences as individuals affected your views of money? If you haven’t already, take a few minutes and answer the following questions about your family of origin:

• Did you grow up rich, poor, or middle class?

• Were you secure or insecure about money?

• Did your family have money secrets or difficulties, or was there never enough?

• Did you see generosity, good shopping habits, and careful planning in your family?

• Was work more important than family or having fun more important than wise money management?

• Did family members gamble, overspend, or have a keeping-up-with-the-Joneses mentality?

• Were there emergency savings, tithing, charitable giving, and paying off credit cards monthly?

• Did your family recycle, sacrifice when needed, save, invest, or use coupons?

• Did your family expect to have the latest fashions, the newest technology, club memberships, new vehicles, furniture, and travel—even when they couldn’t afford it?

• Do peer pressures tend to push you to live beyond your means?

All these attitudes and experiences directly or indirectly influence the way you think about money. Assess their positive or negative influences on your life to determine your views regarding money and finances. Discuss these questions together as a couple and see what you can learn.

How have you learned to handle money through the years? I’d love to know!

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