The Valentine’s Gift That Keeps On Giving
“Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails,” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.
Countdown for Couples: Preparing for the Adventure of Marriage, and The ReMarriage Adventure: Preparing for a Lifetime of Love & Happiness, my first two published books, help prepare couple for marriage or remarriage. In essence, they help engaged couples learn how to love better, and we married couples need to remember those same principles as well.
So on this Valentine’s Day, I want to remind you of the importance of keeping your marriage strong. It’s the best gift you can give your spouse.
Remember what a great adventure your marriage has been and can be, and be careful not to get apathetic about your relationship. As with any journey, there are slow, boring, mundane seasons, but the times of making memories, capturing intimate experiences, and finding quality moments supersedes all the rest. Choose not to get discouraged or weary in well doing, in working at your marriage, in resolving conflict, or in struggling to make ends meet.
Build memories that transcend everyday life. It’s a daily choice…to love unconditionally, to sacrifice substantially, and to enjoy each other eternally.
When your marriage is threatened by you, your spouse, or others; when your thoughts, actions, or attitudes draw your heart away from your relationship; when temptations, lies of the media, or the deceitfulness of your own heart tell you it’s just too hard; when the lust of the flesh, your own sin nature, or work, things or mere exhaustion turn you away from your journey together, fight for your marriage. At such a time, it is critical to regroup, get counseling, and return to the great adventure you’ve set out to accomplish. Let Him lead and guide your marriage and family life, and let Him inspire you, give you new dreams and establish fresh goals.
Marriage is so much about walking out your faith on a daily basis. On this great adventure called marriage, as you join Him in the plans He has for you, you can become more like Christ and learn how to reflect Him with your words and actions. You can show the world how God can take two imperfect people and redeem their lives for His glory. And your marriage in Christ can reflect that intimate and holy relationship of the Trinity! What a great Valentine’s gift that would be.
How do you keep your marriage strong?
Guard Your Heart
“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life,” Proverb 4:23.
It’s a tough world out there, full of nasty thoughts, words, and images. It’s a world that’s becoming more and more counter to all the Bible speaks of that’s good and right and pure. But in such a world, how can we guard our hearts?
For me, I have chosen to be careful what I see, hear, and read. While others can casually watch a rated “R” movie and not be affected, it’s just not so with me. Images cling to my brain and replay in my sleep. Whether it’s scary, violent, or sexually explicit, I can’t get them out of my mind. So, to guard my heart and mind, I don’t let them in.
The same goes for music and literature. I’ve learned that if it’s not good and right and pure, I leave it for others to engage with. Please know that I’m not shaking my finger at anyone who chooses otherwise; I’m just saying that, for me, I have chosen to be careful to guard my heart with my media consumption.
But that’s not the only area of life where I guard my heart. It’s also in my attitudes and actions, and how I choose to accept or respond to the attitudes and actions of others. It’s also important for me to guard my heart in my writing life—to surround myself with encouragers, to balance my writing, to pour out life.
One person can poison my well with negative or critical attitudes if I let them. Another can hurt me by their words or actions. And I can do the same to them, if I’m not careful. Though I can’t be responsible for how others treat me or how they respond to a certain situation, I can make a choice to guard my heart. I hope you will too.
How do you guard your heart?
Making Plans
“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed,” Proverbs 16:3.
It’s still January, still the beginning of the year, and I’m still making my 2015 plans. Yes, I’m getting a slow start, but it’s never too late, right?
While planning, goal-setting, and making bucket lists are well and good, I’ve learned that none of that matters unless those plans, goals, and lists are firmly committed to God’s will and way. My plans need to be His plans. But what does that look like?
For me, that takes time, prayer, and searching my heart to make sure my plans—and the motives that surround them—are biblically based and Spirit led. It could be anything from a vacation to building a friendship to writing my next book; I simply need to check first with the One who knows what’s best for me.
Of course I have to plan my course—plan my days, weeks, months, and year—but I want the Lord to determine my steps (Proverb 16:9). Otherwise, I know I’ll be spinning my wheels, wasting my time, and could even get myself into a whole heap of trouble!
So as I’ve been looking at my weekly blogs and where I should go with them, I going back to square one, and I hope you’ll be blessed. This year, I’m going to focus on what God says in the tattered pages of His Word (see my January 7, 2015 post), especially as they relate to living out our stories of life, love, and leaving a legacy that matters.
Whether it’s about marriage, parenting, grandparenting, or writing, traveling, or some other aspect of life, we’ll ponder the foundation of what God’s word says about life. After all, that’s all that really matters, right?
What would you like to hear about this year concerning life, love, and legacy?
Raising an International Child
I taught my little girl to love and pray for the world, even as a toddler. All it took was a blow up globe and a little fun. As she grew, a globe on the kitchen table gave us a fun educational game I called “Spin Around the World.” During meals, we would often find a country, spin the globe, and call someone’s name. Then that person would have to find where the country was. Before middle school, my kids knew even the tiniest countries and where they were located.
Today my daughter is a missionary in South Africa and my three granddaughters were born there. They are “international children” in every sense of the word, and they have an amazing understanding of God’s big world. And in today’s global economy and society, that’s a good thing.
When my granddaughters were here for Christmas, even though they are just two and four, they talked about living in Cape Town, South Africa. They pointed out “the American flag” every time they saw it, and they sang about “seven red stripes and six white stripes and a field of blue with fifty white stars.” And we read books and talked about God’s love for the world.
They even relished the experience of international travel, and they understood that they were a part of two different countries. And when I asked the oldest whether she liked take-off or landing best, she said, “Oh, Grandma, I like it all!”
Though there’s a bit of melancholy attached to having family live so far away, I know I am partly to blame. I cast a vision for God’s heart for the world in my daughter when she was little and she’s passed it on to her children. But I can’t complain; they are right in the middle of doing God’s work, and for that, I am richly blessed.
So whether you’re a mom, dad, grandparent, or teacher, I encourage you to help children open their eyes to God’s beautiful, big world in this global society of the 21st century. Help them understand that they are a part of history, a part of God’s bigger picture and plan for His world. In this global society, you’ll be glad you did.
How do you feel about us being a global society? I’d love to know.
Let’s Not Miss Him
As we wind up our Christmas celebration and look toward the New Year, I think about the words to the following song. Bethlehem missed the Savior’s coming. Then Jerusalem missed the Savior’s work on the cross.
And us, here in America and around the globe? Will we miss His work in our lives and, one day, His coming? I sure hope not.
As you read these lyrics and look toward 2015, take a moment to awaken to His presence, His love, and His promise of eternity. Happy New Year, friends!
While You Were Sleeping
By Casting Crowns
Oh little town of Bethlehem
Looks like another silent night
Above your deep and dreamless sleep
A giant star lights up the sky
And while you’re lying in the dark
There shines an everlasting light
For the King has left His throne
And is sleeping in a manger tonight
Oh Bethlehem, what you have missed while you were sleeping
For God became a man
And stepped into your world today
Oh Bethlehem, you will go down in history
As a city with no room for its King
While you were sleeping
While you were sleeping
Oh little town of Jerusalem
Looks like another silent night
The Father gave His only Son
The Way, the Truth, the Life had come
But there was no room for Him in the world He came to save
Jerusalem, what you have missed while you were sleeping
The Savior of the world is dying on your cross today
Jerusalem, you will go down in history
As a city with no room for its King
While you were sleeping
While you were sleeping
United States of America
Looks like another silent night
As we’re sung to sleep by philosophies
That save the trees and kill the children
And while we’re lying in the dark
There’s a shout heard ‘cross the eastern sky
For the Bridegroom has returned
And has carried His bride away in the night
America, what will we miss while we are sleeping
Will Jesus come again
And leave us slumbering where we lay
America, will we go down in history
As a nation with no room for its King
Will we be sleeping
Will we be sleeping
United States of America
Looks like another silent night
A Baby Changes Everything
It’s been a fun week with a two year old, a four year old, and an eight month old in the house. Our home is happy and busy, loud and cheery, and definitely full of life. Those three babies have changed everything in our house!
We’ve moved furniture and knickknacks. We baby proofed and put up gates. We added furniture and other small-child necessities.
Yet to think of Mary, a young teenage girl, and all the changes she went through when the Angel Gabriel announced she’d bear the Son of God? Well, that makes all the work I did getting ready for my grandgirls pale at the thought.
Mary was so young, unmarried, and scandalously unprepared for such a heavenly task. Yet God chose her. All her plans and dreams for a “normal” life no longer mattered. “Normal” would never again be Mary’s world. She had a higher calling in store for her.
And what about us? Do we strive for our lives to be “normal”? For our Christmas holiday to be “normal”? Why? He also chose us for a higher calling!
So this Christmas season, I want that Baby to change everything—everything about my day, my thoughts, my relationships, my heart. I want to be filled with the wonder of that Baby—Jesus! As you and I read the lyrics of this song, may that Baby change everything.
A Baby Changes Everything
by Faith Hill
Teenage girl, much too young
Unprepared for what’s to come
A baby changes everything
Not a ring on her hand
All her dreams and all her plans
A baby changes everything
A baby changes everything
The man she loves she’s never touched
How will she keep his trust?
A baby changes everything
A baby changes everything
And she cries!
Ooh, she cries
Ooh, oh
She has to leave, go far away
Heaven knows she can’t stay
A baby changes everything
She can feel He’s coming soon
There’s no place, there’s no room
A baby changes everything
A baby changes everything
And she cries!
And she cries!
Oh, she cries
Shepherds all gather ’round
Up above the star shines down
A baby changes everything
Choir of angels sing
Glory to the newborn King
A baby changes everything
A baby changes everything
Everything, everything, everything
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
My whole life has turned around
I was lost but now I’m found
A baby changes everything, yeah
A baby changes everything